The concept of The Purge and its upcoming sequel The Purge: Anarchy is predicated on the notion that people commit crimes out of a basic human inclination towards violence. Therefore, the films’ fictional lawmakers posited, taking out one day of every year to allow people to get out all of their violent urges would lead to far less crime during the rest of the year.

But the film doesn’t specify that only violent crime is legal. It says that all crime is legal. Putting aside the fact that people might commit crimes for reasons other than ingrained violent tendencies, what about the thousands of non-violent crimes? What about the laws that people obey not out of moral duty, but fear of reprisal? Surely these would be the crimes people would take advantage of during the Purge, instead of just going out and murdering people. Here are some of the things that people would actually do during the Purge that might be worth considering if the series wants a third installment.

 Online Piracy

This one seems pretty obvious, right? I mean, the vast majority of people who don’t pirate media don’t refuse for moral reasons. They just don’t want to get caught. On the night of the Purge, though? Why risk your life outside when you could stay safe indoors AND watch Transformers: Age of Extinction without paying for it? People would wait the entire year for the Purge just so that they could avoid paying for stuff. Let’s face it: People aren’t naturally violent as much as they are naturally petty.

"In this quiet community, the neighbors are all about to share... One HBO GO Password."  The Purge: Anarchy, in theaters Friday.

“In this quiet community, the neighbors are all about to share… One HBO GO Password.” The Purge: Pretty Nice Family Night, Actually, in theaters Friday.

 Insider Trading

The rich and the powerful in America would hide behind their expensive security systems and manipulate the stock market for personal gain. Why? Well, what do you think is holding them back? It’s not their sense of personal responsibility or their compassion for other people. It’s because they don’t want to get caught. If the Purge were to actually occur, our nation’s economy would completely crumble once a year. But don’t worry about any riots from the angry citizens living in a financial wasteland. They wouldn’t dare harm anyone! That’s what the Purge is for, right?

"In a world... where Martha Stewart didn't even go to prison."  The Purge:  Arts and Crafts, coming soon.

“In a world… where Martha Stewart didn’t even go to prison.”
The Purge: Arts and Crafts, coming soon.

Gay Marriage

Can you believe that the majority of the states in this country still outlaw gay marriage? More and more of these laws are being overturned every day, but there are still plenty of places in America where loving couples cannot be married because of the law. Forget banks and electronics stores, the places that would be the most packed during the Purge would be churches and Town Halls. Sure, it’d be dangerous to venture outside to get a marriage license signed. But as the old saying goes, “Love means never having to say, ‘Run, my darling! There’s an axe-wielding maniac in a ski mask right behind you!’”

"This regular couple is about to get more than they bargain for... when they become a quadruple!" The Purge:  What's Next?  People Marrying Animals! coming soon to FoxNews

“This regular couple is about to get more than they bargained for… when they become a quadruple!”
The Purge: What’s Next? People Marrying Animals! coming soon to FoxNews

Buying alcohol after 9pm or on Sundays

Is this a thing anywhere but Connecticut? It’s a really old law, dating back to the Prohibition era, and we’ve only recently got around to repealing it. In any case, the Purge has to fall on a Sunday some years, right? And it takes place at night, so this would always apply. Hey, did you know that this is where ice cream sundaes got their name? Bars that couldn’t serve alcohol on Sundays would serve ice cream instead. It’s true! I heard it somewhere! Anyway, supermarkets would be packed with paying customers, giggling with glee as they purchase beer at night for the first time.

"This Pennsylvania resident... is about to buy a six pack, for the first time." The Purge:  Well, That Law Makes No Sense, in limited release and IMAX.

“This Pennsylvania resident… is about to buy a six pack, for the first time.”
The Purge: Well, That Law Makes No Sense, in limited release and IMAX.

Steal the Declaration of Independence

Admittedly, this one’s a tad specific. But I can think of at least one person who would take this route on Purge Night.

Ooh, I just had a great idea for a cross-over movie.

"Starring Academy Award Winner Nic Cage." The Purge:  Just Give Us Your Money, Suckers, in theaters everywhere.

“Starring Academy Award Winner Nic Cage.”
The Purge: Just Give Us Your Money, Suckers, in theaters everywhere.